Britney Spears going to Namibia to give birth

Britney Spears has told NBC's Matt Lauer that she will move to Namibia "in the near future" to prepare for the birth of her second child, a daughter who is due in "late September or early November." Breaking down in tears during the interview, which will be broadcast Thursday on the Today show and Friday on Dateline, Ms. Spears said she is "an emotional wreck" right now. She blames the paparazzi and the false tabloids for her fragile state of mind.

During the wide ranging interview, Ms. Spears denied rumors that her husband of twenty-one months, Kevin Federline, is living in their basement. She also said repeatedly that she is a "good mom," despite the fact that she was photographed driving her SUV with her son, Sean Preston, sitting on her lap.

"I did it with my dad," said Ms. Spears. "I'd sit on his lap and I'd drive. We're country."

For some reason, perhaps he was having a Tom Cruise flashback, Mr. Lauer neglected to mention that at the time the incident had occurred, last February, Ms. Spears had said her son was on her lap because she was trying to escape the paparazzi and didn't have time to buckle him in his seat.

Mr. Lauer did ask Ms. Spears why she had chosen Namibia for the birth of her child.

"Kevin has always been a fan of African-American culture," she replied. "I'm sure he'll feel at home there, rapping with all the natives. Besides, there's lots of quiet unpaved roads where Sean Preston and I can go driving."

Ms. Spears also said that Namibia reminds her of California "because it's on the ocean and there's lots of sand. So if Sean Preston fell off his swing and landed on his head, there's less chance he would be hurt and we'd have those snoops from child welfare up our butts all the time."

Finally, said Ms. Spears, "I heard that Namibia has laws that let celebrities say whether or not journalists are allowed in the country. That's so important, even more important than getting the same villa that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt had."

In other news, an autopsy conducted at the request of the U.S. military revealed that Abu Musab al-Zarqawi had been dead "at least five minutes" before "a few overenthusiastic soldiers" began stomping on his chest and taunting him. (source:pugbus.com)