I try to get by with a little help from my friends at KTV

My boss looked at me in horror after hearing my startling confession. His glare seemed to condemn me, as if I had just admitted burning the Chinese flag.

"I hate karaoke," I moaned.

Over the weekend I did the right social thing, as I did at last year's Christmas party, and stood in front of 40 co-workers to make a fool of myself singing a strangled version of The Beatles' classic Let It Be. I should have followed the song's advice.

"You foreigners are a strange bunch. How can you hate karaoke?" my boss must have been thinking.

He shook his head before rushing back to the KTV machine to pick another Jay Chou song.

I have worked very hard to understand this obsession but like smelly bean curd and pig intestines, it's just one of those Chinese things I can't stomach.

There is something unnatural about KTV, to me. The colored flashing lights, the fuzzy sound system, the dumb videos of people walking about in parks, the limited song selection and fruit plates. And there's the requirement of standing in front of a bunch of people and performing like a seal. The smaller KTV rooms are a little more forgiving - but I always get terribly bored.

It might help if I got totally hammered on maotai beforehand but most of my Chinese friends don't need to do this. KTV seems to give them a natural high.

I blame Daisuke Inoue.

In 1970, when this Japanese warbler was singing for his supper at the Utagoe Kissa restaurant in Kobe, he decided to create the infamous recording device. Restaurants and hotels throughout Japan hired his invention and the rest is history.

A couple of years ago, one of China's big auto makers struck the right chord when it released the world's first karaoke car. The Geely Beauty Leopard was a sporty coupe that had a built-in karaoke machine.

There are also home KTV systems, and I am told that singing at KTV and drinking copious amounts of booze are important skills that can earn promotions at certain Chinese companies.

I can understand the passion for singing because I love singing too, but I still struggle with KTV.

In Nashville, United States, the folks there have these wonderful social gatherings called picking parties. Up to a dozen people gather in someone's lounge-room with their instruments, mostly guitars, and have a foot-tapping good time.

The guests sit in a circle and each person has a turn choosing a song, which they lead. Everybody is playing something and most sing along on the chorus. It's more about the music, than just the singing. There is a beautiful connection.

The Irish have similar sing-alongs in their pubs too. In fact, up until a century or so ago, sing-alongs were much more part of the cultural fabric.

But karaoke? Despite my protests, I know I haven't seen the last of the inside of a KTV room and I accept it is here to stay. Acceptance seems to be the solution to all my cultural problems.

When I find myself in times of trouble, Mother Mary comforts me, speaking words of wisdom: Let it be, Let it be.

(China Daily 12/27/2007 page20)